Alright topic for today: Anger
No I don't get angry easily at all. But you can argue that 'People who always justify at the start on what they are not are usually what they are.' So eh, point made. Maybe I am angst always.
True. I get annoyance time to time but anger? Lesser than three times a year for the past of my life. Really it's hard to get me angry and again, for those that is confuse with 'annoyed' and 'anger' I'll kindly define the difference.
"Anger is an Emotion. There are only five of them for humans.
Annoyance and irratation are emotional states. Annoyance and irritation are one of many, many states of the emotion Anger."
So in other term, or my terms, anger is WILD FIRE while annoyance is FIRE on match sticks - small irritation basically.
NOW ANGER.
I found out I get so easily triggered on anger this year.
It's been more than three times and I'm not sure whether it's the people or me. Pretty sure when you get older, you'll be more defined on what makes you angry and what's not. Well here's mine.
First ever full-blown-rage incident: 21st Birthday Planning
It starts one fine Sunday with the usual family group, aka cousins gathering. Now I have a cousin that is turning 21 as well in July, while mine is in October. We started the topic as I told them I'm planning a chalet for my 21st, which is a typical norm for my age group, so the chalet will be in October.
NOW cousin JD asked P (who is turning 21) about his birthday plans as well, to which he responded 'Erm not a chalet cause.. I don't want the entire family to go to chalet twice a year."
HOLD IT.
RIGHT.
THERE.
What da fuck hell are you talking about?
Since when did you convert your religion to a 'saint' that you cared about the entire family's well-being? AND SINCE WHEN WAS THERE A LAW SAYING YOU CAN'T GO TO CHALET TWICE A FREAKING YEAR?
That was a full blown wtf moment that I haven't felt in a long time because honestly, all I see and hear are words full of FAKE-R.
Now this is only the start. Because of great-oh-saintly P, JD remarked "Why not celebrate it with Pearlina?" to which he responded "I don't mind!" in a holy voice that only angels can hear. Unfortunately a demon like me translate it to "fuck you and your limelight"
(For the next part if you are a great-oh-saintly person like P you'll probably curse how inhumane I am so be warned.)
CELEBRATE?
YOUR JULY
IN YOUR COUSIN'S ACTUAL 21ST OCTOBER?
4 MONTHS IS CLOSE ENOUGH TO CELEBRATE TOGETHER?
HOLD IT.
RIGHT THERE.
AGAIN.
For the past 21 years of our life and history since when did we celebrate our birthdays together? Even if it's 4 months close BUT BRUH IN FACTS AND LIFE MATTER, IT IS NOT CLOSE AT ALL. I am sure some can't do math lemme do it for you: 4months/12months is 1/3 of a year.
So you're saying our birthdays are 1/3 close enough to celebrate it together. Omo sounds like a grand idea. At this rate I need to celebrate my birthday with people who's birthday falls all the way till January cause of the 1/3 rule. Petition to make this an official rule in the bible so if people don't abide to it, it's a sin.
NOW being rational, I would understand if it's a week or in the same month but tell me the linkage between July and October. LOOK ME straight in the eye and tell me it's reasonable celebrating it together.
Adding on to the next point, really touch your heart, TOUCH IT. AND SAY OUT LOUD "Turning 21 don't deserve such a big hooha. Obviously my only girl cousin turning 21 don't mind sharing her chalet with me."
Erm sorry.
I mind.
Precisely because it's 21st.
In fact if it's 22, go right ahead on the celebration together. Oh. But wait. You only want this year cause 21st no biggie.
So if my friends come to the party and asked why I am doing it together with my cousin, I have the full authorities to say "Cause I am a bitch who wants my 21st in October that my poor cousin have no choice but to celebrate his July with me. I mean my family can only attend chalet once a year. It's sacred and holy."
BITCH PLEASE. 4 MONTHS AND 21ST? I AINT CELEBRATING EVEN IF YOU ARE MY BROTHER.
NOW. Back to the part where he ended with "I don't mind". In honest fact, I wasn't angry at him for that part. It is the taunting and questions after FROM cousin JD and JN.
Of course after he said idm I gave an extremely sarcastic 'sure' to which both -wise cousins- kept prying 'whywhywhy' THROUGHOUT. THE. ENTIRE.
It was annoyance at the start, the taunting turns to anger and rage as whenever I explained the 4 months diff and the 21st, they would retaliate with 'I still don't see why" GIVING OFF the look and of course I know the exact answer they want to hear from me.
"I don't like P."
You can say it's a biased judgement but these are facts.
EVEN if I like, worship and adore you, with your birthday in 21st July celebrating in my 21st October, I would still go wtf you talking about? It's just fake ignorance and transparent.
I was at lost on rage because JD and JN are what I called wise. So I ended up in both rage and disappointment from the fact that they -wise men- are willing to ignore these facts just so they can force me to say 'I don't like P'.
LIKE they are no longer interested in reasons. I KNOW what you want me to say but I'm not saying it cause that's NOT the truth.
It's like forcing someone to say 'I hate sprite' when they in actual facts can't drink it cause of citric acid, but hey you just want to hear that phrase to the point where you poured sprite all over the person saying "Now, do you hate sprite because it's spilled all over you?"
NO. I don't like P, but the reason I am not celebrating my 21st with him is due to the fact that it's 4 months apart and it's A 21ST.
ITS. FACTS. It was never about whether I like or dislike someone. I am not an irrational person. They say if you forbid something from happening, you gotta have reasons why. Here are mine and if you still want to based it on because I dislike P, then balls to you. I'll give you the rights to call me a bitch.
Bye to my admiration and faith to me cousins.
//
I would start on the second incident. But I'm tired now so the second story shall wait.
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