Where do I begin

'Cause I'm sick of losing soulmates, so where do we begin I can finally see, you're as fucked up as me So how do we win?

-Dodie

SO OBSESSED WITH HER RIGHT NOW??? HER SONGS ARE EVERYTHING.

//

"We're not bruised They're just party tattoos. And that colourful mess Is just colorful regret. Black lipstick will never be a sin. We'll regret it when we're old with wrinkled up skin"

//

"I've got a secret for the mad in a little bit of time it won't hurt so bad and I get that I don't get it you will burn right now but then you won't regret it"

//
Time after time

Questions

Well, school starts tomorrow and hey I don’t feel like school is starting.

Anyways the MAIN RANT FOR TODAY.

Honestly where do I stand in people’s lives? Like honestly.
It’s so hard to gauge whether you should care for someone as a friend, family or gender (female in my case) cause I’ll never know where I stand?

Okay probably 90 percent of the time we’ll know it. A Friend. A family.

But goddamnit IM SO LOST. Everyone has a chapter of their story untold and those are stories we shouldn’t pry. A chapter of their life that they don’t want to be revealed. I understand. I do. Cause I have them too despite how great my life is, and I don’t want people to pry either. There’s this solemn understanding and mannerism between people that you’ll know when to stop prying.

BUT NOW THAT IM HERE I CANT HELP TO WANT TO KNOW?

WHY? CAUSE I CARE.

IS IT RELATED TO YOU? MAYBE AND MAYBE THATS THE REASON I CARE.

WILL IT HURT YOU? NO?

WILL IT HURT THE OTHER PARTY? PROB NO?

IS IT FOR THE SAKE OF THE OTHER PARTY OR FOR YOUR OWN CURIOSITY?

NOW THAT. That is the reason I stopped prying? Cause I realised in the end regardless or not whether it’s related to me, the reason why I want to know is really to get closure. But what am I gonna do once I get the answer? I Guess we’re in this situation cause neither of us know where we stand in each other’s lives. If that’s the case, the person that will break that question first, will be where the closure be?

WORRIED AND CONFLICTED.

And worst of all, these are all emotions the other party is feeling but IM FEELIN IT TOO. I just can’t don’t care about it aye. Aye?

HELLO 2018

How can I not blog on such a day? IT'S 2018 HAPPY NEW YEAR PEOPLE!

Again, I can't believe 2017 is over I'm already missing it omg. If people ask me when is the best time of my life it's definitely gonna be last year cause wew, so much feels.

ANWS MOVING ON IN LIFE. Any resolutions for the year? Hmm.

No.

Not now.

I make resolutions almost every year actually as back then, it was a factor I feel makes me motivated for the year. Like last year, my resolutions was to drive at least 3 times (I still remember fresh in my head), make it to uni, and (WHEN THE YEAR PASSED I was still in internship and pretty darn sad that it was ending and all my friends would leave so) everlasting friendship.

SPEAKING OF WHICH, I remembered feeling so down when intern ending on 3 Feb as I was convinced that the guys won't contact anymore due to NS. BUT LOOK AT WE NOWWWWW. All dem Korea memories, dramas, girls and shits dealing with alcohol BAD INFLUENCE GUYS.

Okay so I figured resolutions are no longer my motivations for the year, or maybe because I have no wishes right now, so ain't gonna try making one.

BUT TO 2018 here's for you. May all whom matters find their place in life based on happiness, success and wealth (CLICHÈ SHYT I KNOW) and sincerely may our relationship stay the same and beyond infinity cause I can’t bear to lose anyone.

Also to love and friendship in 2018 for those whom crave for it (ME ME HAHHAHA) and to every good opportunities that'll be given and may it be a peaceful and fruitful year for everyone (that I care, cause idc about anyone else that are not my people or related to them.)

Here's to 2018. Cheers!

To Cousin JD

Dear Cousin JD,

You’re not wise anymore.

But you’re still important✨.

Love,
Your Dear Cousin

Update // 2017 is ending WHATS

MAAAAN now that 2017 is ending, I HAVE SO MUCH FEELS.

This year has been so memorable for me, more so than others although more or less I'm pretty contented with the years in my life, BUT MAN THIS YEAR.

From chingus to new friends and experiences. I guess somewhere along the line I've figured out my place in life, from my wants to don't wants, likes to dislikes and humans to humans.

I guess I've reach a more spiritual level of closeness with some people I didn't get to during the past years, and for that I'm grateful. Adding on I realised the importance of family - although again I've always been close with my fam but still, this year more so.

Cherishing humans has become more important, at least to those I care, like even though we rarely chat anymore, they are always there when we need them? Maybe it's adulthood. Ya know. When meeting face to face becomes harder, and those that can can, but for those that can't we can always find a next time

And somewhere along the line I've changed my flow in life, letting me take me wherever it takes. LIKE, I don't plan far. I guess whatever life throws at me I'll take it. Every opportunity. And I'm chasing for some. AND MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, I hope this curiosity never ends.

AYE THE END.
2017 has been a great year.